she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
