i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I have tasted many bathrooms
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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