Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
