Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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