Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
