What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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