Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
The feeling are messing with the penis
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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