I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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