There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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