hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
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I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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