just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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