Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize