At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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