I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
