I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Randomize
