She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
