I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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