he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
