i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
