Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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