all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize