No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
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ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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