You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
