That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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