erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
It's never too late to be topless.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
