u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
