Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
