so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
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Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
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I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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