I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
