I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.