If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I think your dad took our porno
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
