I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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