My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
