I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
