I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
