What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
