Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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