I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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