I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
