He asked to "fluff my boner.."
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
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Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
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I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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