I'm gonna have a badass scar
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
