drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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