But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
why do cheetos always look like penises
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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