Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
