other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
