Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
