so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
