There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize