Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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