carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
