Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
